Show love through money - connect
I Love You. Be Mine. Merry Me. Common phrases shared between partners and loved ones during the Valentine’s season. We love the romantic tones of forever in every declaration. They hold lovely dreams of what is to come for our lives.
I Need Help. I Can Do This. How Will This Get Done? What’s Next? How many phrases like these go unheard between the same partners due to fear or uncertainty? Probably a lot. Another way to show love through money is to honestly connect with others about our finances. What do we need? Encouragement, assistance, support, education, etc. What are the pains and triumphs in our personal finances? You may desire to go back to school but are unsure how that will be accomplished and the impact on the family. Is the company downsizing and a game plan is needed for the next few months?
Honey, can we talk? Four brave words that can build a bridge connecting us to the people we love. Opening up about the challenges and uncertainty we face draws people closer and makes them part of the team. Will that discussion go exactly as planned? Odds are no. Will there be agreement at the conclusion? Maybe not. But is it worth the difficult conversation? Absolutely!! Tips for how to do this.
Tip #1 – Blame game is not helpful. You may believe you are the injured party in the state of your finances, but it will take both of you to correct it. Your partner may be unaware of how their choices impact the household finances practically, and you mentally. Provide data about the credit card balances (and payments) relative to monthly income. Express your concern about the long-term effects of this pattern. Bring your partner along in the discussion and plan to spend and choose differently.
Tip #2 – No plan is final. Your partner can supply valuable insight that should not be underestimated. Even if you have identified the problem and the solution, there could be blind spots. They may have a particular perspective on how to accomplish the household goal. Engage their thinking and creativity to solve the puzzle. You may be surprised at how appreciated they feel when you ask their opinion.
Tip #3 – Let it breath. You have been thinking about this for weeks. Your partner may be hearing this for the first time. Give them space to absorb the information, process and ask questions. Do your best to stay away from offense if they give an opposing opinion. People feel walls going up when they are being shut out. Agreement might not be immediately reached, and many more conversations may be necessary. But giving space for consideration and feedback is a giant step towards unity.
Tip #4 – Express how you feel…about them. Remember, you are having this difficult discussion because you love them and want the best for your family. Your frustration could be for good reasons. However, you are frustrated because you care. Make sure your partner knows your heart behind the conversation. It matters.
50/70/100 principle. Lots of effort in the month of love! What small steps have you decided to take to show love through money? Email or call at letstalk@studiomfinancial.net, 469-615-0387. Until we meet…keep working on the change.